Jul 20, 2021
Corey Costanzo is the Co-Owner of Asheville’s Still Point Wellness Spa, a licensed addiction counselor, trauma specialist, master didgeridoo player, colleague, and good friend. One of the greatest joys in his life involves relating with others. So, it’s not surprising that he remembers one sentence I said over a year ago in one of our conversations: that the number one predictor of a relationship’s success is allowing influence. But sometimes, opening up to our partners’ thoughts and ideas can be challenging, especially if we’re still working on our tendencies to withdraw and our need to be right.
How do you accept your partner’s influence with gentleness - without feeling disempowered or defensive?
In this episode, Corey and I share some examples of opening up to influence in our relationships with our partners, in our work as therapists, and in our friendship with each other. We emphasize the importance of embracing your partner’s influence and thoughts with grace, humility, and a good heart. We share how men are normally socially conditioned to seek “winning” and reject the notion of opening up to influence from their partners. We also share statistical data that provides insight into the effects of sharing power in a relationship and underscore how embracing influence can make our relationships more magical.
“The best way to effectively share power in a relationship is when we can each have a voice and when we can each feel confident about the influence of our voice.” - Corey Costanzo
This week on Relationships! Let’s Talk About It:
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Theme music “These Streets” provided by Adi the Monk