May 18, 2021
Seeking approval from our peers and loved ones is natural. We want other people to like us whenever we walk in the world. Trish Kruger, a licensed clinical mental health counselor for Blue Ridge Treks, believes that our need for validation and approval from others is part of our history as human beings. But, Trish suggests when we start feeling constricted and heavy in the course of seeking approval, that’s how we’ll know we’ve tipped the scale and have done too much, forgetting to honor our authenticity along the way.
In this episode, Trish and I discuss the human need for validation and the point when approval-seeking becomes detrimental for individuals and their relationships. We describe the relationship between self-esteem & seeking approval and the importance of cultivating a strong sense of self. We explain how our relationship with approval is formed in childhood and discuss how minority groups are forced to seek approval to survive. We also underscore how adult attachment styles impact our desire to seek approval and highlight how we can respond with compassion and kindness to the parts of ourselves that need approval and validation from others.
“Healthy validation is rooted in love - we need that as communal beings. We’re meant to be in our tribe, and being in our tribe helps us feel understood.” - Trish Kruger
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Theme music “These Streets” provided by Adi the Monk