Oct 20, 2020
Codependency is rather insidious: though many people are familiar with the term, they don’t know how it manifests in families and impacts relationships. Awareness, Corey Costanzo stresses, is key to healing it. Corey is a licensed addictions counselor and bodywork therapist, somatic experiencing practitioner, a master didgeridoo player, and a good friend of mine. Together with his wife, Robin, Corey co-owns Still Point Wellness, a premier Esalen Massage and Salt Water Floatation spa in Asheville, North Carolina.
Today, Corey and I explore the hallmarks of a dysfunctional family and how it breeds codependency. We illustrate the dynamics of codependent relationships and their children and explain why dysfunctional families find it difficult to navigate difficult emotions and situations. We describe the characteristics of codependent behaviors and illustrate their impact on relationships. We also share our experiences in dealing with codependent relationships and emphasize the role of awareness in breaking the cycle of codependency.
“Codependency is an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have healthy, mutually satisfying relationships.” - Corey Costanzo
This week on Relationships! Let’s Talk About It:
- Codependency as a learned behavior in families and how it can be passed to generations
- The relationship between codependency and addiction
- The consequences of codependent behavior
- Codependent relationships between children and parents
- Why parents need to deal with their own emotions
- The characteristics of a dysfunctional family
- What makes families afraid of discussing difficult emotions and experiences
- Detachment and fear of connection in dysfunctional families
- Experiencing codependence in my family and learning to talk about emotions
- How Corey cultivated trust between himself and a teenager in his practice
- Breaking the cycle of codependency in couples
- Witnessing our partners’ experiences with emotions
- What enmeshment in a relationship looks like and what it takes to be differentiated
- Relationships with people with diagnosed mental illness and how to navigate them
- The fear of abandonment and the experience of isolation in codependent relationships
- The characteristics of codependent people and how codependency manifests in a couple’s sex life
Related Content:
- Expressing Needs
- Emotional Regulation
- Do the Right Thing
- Is Stress Affecting Your Relationship?
- The Importance of a Personal Practice
- Addictions and Their Effects on Relationships
- Sound and Attunement Healing in Relationships
Resources Mentioned:
- Headspace App
- Al-Anon Family Groups
- Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie
- Facing Love Addiction: Giving Yourself the Power to Change the Way You Love by Pia Mellody
Connect with Corey Costanzo:
- Still Point Wellness
- Still Point Wellness on Facebook
- Still Point Wellness on Pinterest
- Still Point Wellness on Instagram
- Corey Costanzo on LinkedIn
Let’s Talk About It!
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Theme music “These Streets” provided by Adi the Monk